How Not To Help Your Parents Plan For Death
Just last week, my parents attended a seminar at a local funeral home to assist them in planning for death. They came home all abuzz about such terms as “spousal trusts” and “mirror wills”.
Helping your parents plan for death is a very complex enterprise. For starters, they may not want your help. If they do, they may want help ensuring their assets will not be squandered after death, and, if you are anything like me, the last thing you want to think about is what is going to happen after your parents die. Avoidance of the problem is a possible consequence.
However, avoiding the issue is not a way of coping with the inevitability of the death of your parents and other loved ones. It is crucial that, for instance, an Estate Trustee that will abide by your parents’ last wishes is chosen. It may be advisable to pay attention to Mom when she tells you what she wants done with her remains, regardless of whether the conversation makes you uncomfortable. Further, wills should be updated in the case that they wish to give gifts to, for instance, recently born grandchildren or great-grandchildren, or revoke gifts given to the undeserving. In my case, my parents’ Wills are about as old as I am and stand in need of revision. If input is requested by one’s parents, listening to what your parents want and encouragement to be communicative is key.
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